Writing Together: Turning Solitude into Shared Success

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One of the hardest parts of writing, believe it or not, is actually writing. Sounds crazy, right? But it's true. Embracing the suck, the mess, and allowing yourself the space to be vulnerable is HARD! I've learned this year that sometimes it takes someone helping you create that kind of space.

My name is Mars, I am 20 years old and I've been writing since the 4th grade. However, I had never, ever, finished a first draft before. I was too busy burying my head underneath expectations I THOUGHT people would have me and my work. Expectations that didn't matter just yet, despite my good intentions with this thought process. Perfectionism had a tight grip on me. It caused me to scrap several projects with potential beyond belief. It prevented me from ever finishing a story. From ever getting past that first draft.

Until November 21st of this year. And the only reason I can finally say "I DID IT!" was because I had the right tools and the best people pushing me toward my goals.

In all my years of writing, despite my love for it, I never saw myself as a fantasy writer. I had written bits and pieces of the genre in the past, but I never envisioned that I would ever publish anything fantasy. That said, the first draft I finished is a fantasy story, with crazy characters and worldbuilding, and it is one of my proudest creations.

I'll repeat, one of my biggest problems with writing was battling perfectionism. I neglected the drafting process, and I did not nurture my skills and talent. I never even gave myself the opportunity to contemplate participating something that, turns out, I excel in! Often times, I even failed to listen to my intuition as a writer. Which led to premature closer, imposter syndrome, and down-right hating everything I wrote. No story was complete, no idea was ever good enough, and my love for writing felt misplaced. Writing was torturous. It was during this time that I declared writing was strictly a hobby for me, and it wasn't to be taken seriously.

While I'm pretty sure most writers go through this, or at least something similar, it caused me to stop writing for a long while. Entirely. The difference between then now boils down to this:

I credit myself and I allow myself to express and explore my ideas and stories freely.

I set goals, even ones that are outlandish, and I continuously make progress and work toward said goals.

And, arguably most importantly, I have a support system.

If you know me, or anything about me, you probably know that I recently started working with a writing coach. Her name is Rachel Giffin, and I swear she's an angel. It was because of her - and a few a few major life events - that I switched my focus and started taking my "little hobby" seriously again.

It was through Rachel that I met some super awesome people that helped me push through. Each one of them helped me finish this draft - helped me finish a draft for the first time ever. Especially my dear friend, Amy, who actually is writing about this topic with me today. I have her linked here for anyone interested in her insight on this topic. She also links all of our socials at the end of her blog post if you want to connect with us on Instagram.

I met Amy through Rachel's online community. (She has a bunch of resources posted there, and the community is free to join with lots of great features. I have it linked here for anyone interested in checking it out.) I joined the community after Rachel reached out to me on Instagram and sent me the link. It was during office hours, a casual hangout one Friday afternoon, that I met my now best friend, Amy.

We connected. We shared our work and our love of writing. And together, with an awesome community and a fantastic coach holding us up, I finished my first draft and she finished her structural edits.

So the big question… How did we do it?

To put it simply, we worked together. But I know that's probably, like, the least satisfactory answer I could give you, so let's dive into it.

One of the most helpful things I did with Amy was writing together in sprints. These can be done solo, but we found it more productive with two or more people. This way, our friends would hold us accountable and we would make progress, even if it was small.

What is a writing sprint?

To participate in a writing sprint, select a certain amount of time (This can be as little as five minutes or as long as an hour or more) and clear your schedule. This is your time to write and work toward absolutely killing your writing goals. Dedicate this time to your project and minimize distractions. Amy and I usually sprint together at least once a week. Typically, we write in 25 minute sprints at a time until we are satisfied and call it a day. The idea is to (metaphorically) approach your overwhelming story with a plastic fork and make bite-sized pieces of progress. Soon enough, you will have devoured you project and hit your big goal. This makes your work feel easier to tackle, and before you know it, you've accomplished what you've set out to do.

(If you want to join us for writing sessions like this, Rachel hosts them weekly on her community. They're free to attend. As of the time I am writing this, the next one is December 2nd, 2024, and we meet on Mondays! you can find more information on her community website.)

It is also important to just generally support your fellow writers. We all chat about our work and praise each other's ideas all the time. Feeling confident in your writing makes exploring your ideas so much easier and keeps the creativity flowing. We have each other's backs through every line we write. We celebrate each other's success. No, seriously, we celebrate EVERYTHING, big and small. And we always help each other push through the bad times. During our lows, we comfort each other and we work together to identify the problem. Then we solve it.

For example, I recently felt that I just couldn't reach the finish line of my draft - no matter what I did or how many "final scenes" I wrote. When I asked Amy to look over the last ten chapters I had written, she suggested that I already had the ending. Right in front of me. When I gave it some thought, I concluded she was right! And she watched as I fleshed out my final scene for my first draft. After I declared that scene "The End" she left a comment telling me she was "SO PROUD" of what I had accomplished.

Sometimes, just having someone to listen while you talk through your ideas can be enough to solve a problem. (Our community meets casually every Friday to discuss general writing - or to take a break and share other things with each other. We call this "Office Hours" and it's super fun. We also do Open-Mic Nights to share our work in a more professional way!) Giving and receiving support like this is a crucial part of the nurturing process for me, and I feel can be helpful for others too.

The difference I've seen in my work and process since connecting with other writers has been drastic. And while these things may not be every writer's cup of tea, I do feel like tons of writers could benefit from this. I often wonder how many great writers, drenched in potential, are hiding out there. How many of them are in the same boat I was a year ago? How many need their Amy and their Rachel?

This isn't to say I wasn't a good writer before. It is to say that the writer I was before I met these people would have never had the confidence to so much as publish this blog. So, if nothing else…

I want you to know, person to person, you are good enough to do whatever you want. No one can tell your story except you. And writer to writer, I want you to know that you are far too hard on yourself. You will always be your worst critic, as the old saying goes. But please, nurture your skills, talent, and creativity. The best gift you could ever give to yourself is freedom. Freedom from feeling like writing your story is IMPOSSIBLE. I learned the hard way. Sometimes, we just have to to hear it from someone else. Stop holding yourself back with doubt and negativity. Writing isn't perfect. It is flawed, it is scary, and it is personal. It is terrifying to share your work, and more often than not, we either lose sight of the bigger picture - or get lost in it. Both of which can hurt our work. I guess what I'm trying to say is, let me be your support system. If only for this moment.

Go write that book.

You have me cheering you on.